What the World Needs Now is EMPATHY!

When Hal David died a couple of weeks ago, I found myself listening to a song he wrote with Burt Bacharach called, "What the World Needs Now is Love."

Yes, I agree, the world could always use a little more love, but what we could use a lot more of is empathy.

Just in this country alone, we find ourselves divided between red and blue states; conservatives and liberals; haves and have nots; elites and the common man. It's getting to be re-goddamn-diculous how special interest groups, politicians and the media have created narratives that have pitted people against each other. Instead of critically reflecting on issues of the day and coming together for the sake of each other; we choose to demonize each other without even considering the other person's perspective.

It's disturbing. 

I once wondered if people by nature were mean, or if they were nice. Research has shown that people are neutral...and that may be part of the problem.

Being neutral allows for one to be indifferent. If you're indifferent, you less likely to seek understanding with things which don't concern you or your interests. If you're not seeking understanding, how would you then be able to show empathy?

In other words, it is difficult to show empathy to those who can do nothing for you...but easy to love those who can.

Therefore, that unemployed welfare person needs to pull themselves up by their bootstraps. But your loved one who is struggling to make ends meet, is OK with getting a loan from you to carry them over until they're back on their feet...The union that helped your immigrant grandfather get and keep a job, while excluding African Americans was great for the working man, but the the Teacher's Unions of today is ruining your child's education.

Although we will never live in a Kumbaya World, we can do better. A great starting point would be in simply learning to LISTEN!

Until next Monday...

To Stay Home Election Day?

I recently read an article about several Black pastors who have been advising their parishioners not to vote in this year’s election.

My friends, these men and women who call themselves pastors, are not only being treasonous to our country, but they are betraying the legacy of those who risked life and limb for the right to cast a single vote AND they are demonstrating what the Bible describes as false teachers.

Although I'm staunchly behind the idea of the separation of church and state, the Black Church has a unique place in American society when it comes to social justice. Nonetheless, leadership in some congregations seems to be offended by the issue of marriage equality for people within the LGBT community. When the president stated that he supported the right for gay people to marry, many of these people decided that they would not vote for him since he supported "sin." However, they failed to realize that in these Divided States of America, marriage is a civil right with legal and financial consequences. Therefore, whom people choose to love is their business and is an issue outside the realm of religion.

Yes, religion CAN be a factor, but religion does not necessarily HAVE TO BE a factor in order to have a legal marriage in the United States.

Therefore, these pastors are out of line on several fronts in telling their members to stay home and not vote.

First, it is simply none of their business that consenting adults of legal age, in a loving relationship, choose to marry. The U.S.A, (also known as the Divided States of America), is a democracy, not a theocracy. It is a land of laws based on the Constitution...not the Bible.

Second, it would be wonderful if some of these pastors really studied and appreciated the history of the civil rights movement in this country. If they did, they would come across the name of Bayard Rustin, an openly gay man who was an influential adviser to many civil rights leaders, including Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

It was Rustin, who played a key role in organizing the March On Washington where Dr. King gave his "I Have A Dream" speech.

Third, do these pastors take note of some of the men who sing in their choirs? I've seen and heard more gay men singing and leading the flock in more black churches than I can count.

Lastly, it's simply time that these pastors get off their high self-righteous horses, stop the hypocrisy and get over it. People died for the right to vote, and to tell parishioners NOT to vote is foolish, hypocritical and an affront to real issues affecting the black community and this nation. This is not meek and humble/ This is ARROGANT.  It would be hard for me to imagine Jesus Christ telling people not to exercise their rights to vote with the possibility to make a world a better place for the least of these.

Until next Monday…

Keeping Your Own Counsel

The past year has been a year of losses and lessons -- musings and mistakes.

As social media becomes an integral part of our lives, it’s important to pay attention to how it affects our personhood and us. Despite the advantages of technology, there are still individuals behind the smart phones or computer screens whom very much have a soul. 

We mustn’t forget this. 

I used to post a lot of information about my life, including seeking advice from “friends” on Facebook. In hindsight this was very stupid. When I got together with these people in real life, I would have this awkward feeling and would mentally ask myself: “Why is this person asking me such personal questions? Do they even know me?”

Later still, another Facebook post led to some gossip that set off a chain of events that turned friends into enemies, and enemies into the-worst-people-in-the-world.

Because of this, I now keep my own counsel.

The Free Dictionary by Farlex defines this as to keep one's thoughts and plans to oneself; to withhold from other people one's thoughts and plans.

Initially this was tough, as I like to tell stories about my life. But as I started withholding, I noticed that I started worrying less and started trusting myself more. I felt OK with making mistakes, which in turn, removed my creative blocks. Finally, I felt like myself again and not the me that I felt I needed to be, in order to put others at ease.

Of course I have a couple of confidantes. But when all is said and done, I will trust my instincts and keep my own counsel.

Today, make it a goal to start keeping your own counsel.

Until next Monday…

Denial Is A Helluva Drug....

I recently came across a website that had an article entitled, "Six Inconvenient Truths About the U.S. and Slavery." The author, Michael Medved, attempts to re-write history by listing six so-called facts that Americans refuse to accept about slavery in America. He posits:

1. SLAVERY WAS AN ANCIENT AND UNIVERSAL INSTITUTION, NOT A DISTINCTIVELY AMERICAN INNOVATION.

2. SLAVERY EXISTED ONLY BRIEFLY, AND IN LIMITED LOCALES, IN THE HISTORY OF THE REPUBLIC – INVOLVING ONLY A TINY PERCENTAGE OF THE ANCESTORS OF TODAY’S AMERICANS. 

3. THOUGH BRUTAL, SLAVERY WASN’T GENOCIDAL: LIVE SLAVES WERE VALUABLE BUT DEAD CAPTIVES BROUGHT NO PROFIT.

4. IT’S NOT TRUE THAT THE U.S. BECAME A WEALTHY NATION THROUGH THE ABUSE OF SLAVE LABOR: THE MOST PROSPEROUS STATES IN THE COUNTRY WERE THOSE THAT FIRST FREED THEIR SLAVES.

5. WHILE AMERICA DESERVES NO UNIQUE BLAME FOR THE EXISTENCE OF SLAVERY, THE UNITED STATES MERITS SPECIAL CREDIT FOR ITS RAPID ABOLITION.

6. THERE IS NO REASON TO BELIEVE THAT TODAY’S AFRICAN-AMERICANS WOULD BE BETTER OFF IF THEIR ANCESTORS HAD REMAINED BEHIND IN AFRICA.

Hahahahahaha!!!!

After reading this, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry at the level of ignorance that exists among a certain segment of society in this country.
 
The first thing that came to mind was that we need to do a better job at teaching the history of slavery in this country. After all, Mr. Medved insists that slavery "only existed briefly...involving a tiny percentage of the ancestors of today's Americans."
 
Where did Mr. Medved get this information? You'd figure that if one is to make this kind of claim, they would have academic resources to support it. But no! Mr. Medved presents none of that and received over 300 "likes" regarding the article, which indicates that there are others who believe these falsehoods.

Nonetheless, this says ALOT about the psyche of some Americans, in that they would rather be oblivious to the terrible truths, instead of facing them and doing the work to ameliorate a situation. To some people, SLAVERY was a long time ago, and blacks should just get over. To others, slavery is not as bad as they portray it in the media.

This is dangerous.

Conversely, more and more blacks, including myself, have walked away from the table when it comes to discussing slavery and racial history in the United States with a certain segment of society. It is pointless to speak and engage in a dialogue with people who will not listen to you, due to their inability to see a perspective beyond their own.

To engage Mr. Medved in a conversation, where you would present him with research and facts would be an exercise in futility. This is what a conversation on racison has become. 

Ultimately, you now have perpetrators of racism calling historical victims of racism, RACISTS! I even saw a commentator on MSNBC say that "real racism is self-evident."

I have learned to walk away from these type of conversations regarding race and inequality, as denial is a helluva drug!

Until next Monday...

Apathy?

I remember a phone call that I got from my aunt nearly 4 year ago in October of 2008. She told me that me grandmother was in the hospital and that her heart was giving out. The doctors gave her about 3 to 5 years to live.

Nonetheless, my grandmother fought hard and believed that she would live to be 100 years old. Unfortunately, she would die on November 26, 2011 at the age of 83.

When my grandmother was in the hospital that October of 2008, she told those doctors that they were going to have to release her so that she could vote for Barack Obama.

And she did it...She got out of the hospital and voted and lived long enough to see a black man elected to the presidency of the United States of America.

I will never forget that. It actually saddens me when I read Facebook posts by young people and others who are apathetic to politics and the right to vote. Do they understand that human beings were beaten and killed simply for wanting to exercise their right to cast a ballot?

What does that say about human nature? Are we really that selfish and narcissistic?

I want to be optimistic...but something tells me that this is wishful thinking.

Until next Monday...